Maybe someone is interesting and will read this:

I know I am not long on dA just since2 or 3 months and I think HOBBYIST artist is not really correct.
My art is really important for me because the drawing is the only thing what I can.
Many pageviews, watchers, friends and so on means for me that I am a good artist,
this things are very important for me but now I see that I have not so much.
I understand not really what I am writing here :,(

I haven´t got much pageviews and so on... this means for me that I am not an artist
And I have no problem to say you that I am crying in this moment  
I realized early that I have not that what I wish me but I didn´t want to give up.
But now I don´t know what I can do  because my goal has been lost more and more.
I am not sure how I can explain it :,(
I am very sad and I am crying every night and  it don´t stop.
I just wanted that I would be accepted as an artist and just wanted attention
But I don`t want to leave DeviantArt D:

I am sad and confused and I hope you will help me a bit <3